Trump wants to limit kids to three dolls and five pencils each. He's right.

[Zorro]

For years now, I've believed America's ungrateful children deserve, at most, three dolls and five pencils. Anything more spoils the little wretches and makes them happy.

I have long been a one-issue voter, and that issue is making sure American families can only buy their children a limited number of dolls and pencils. That’s why I proudly cast my vote for President Donald "Three Dolls" Trump, and I’m delighted to see him coming through on the thing that matters most to me.

In a recent interview, Trump was asked about his tariffs on China and how they might lead to higher prices and empty store shelves, and he said this of American children: “I'm just saying they don't need to have 30 dolls. They can have three. They don't need to have 250 pencils. They can have five.”


Exactly.

For years now, I’ve believed America’s ungrateful children deserve, at most, three dolls and five pencils. Anything more spoils the little wretches and makes them happy. Smiling children will be useless on the assembly lines of all the U.S. factories that will be built thanks to Trump’s tariffs. As the saying goes, “Stop smiling and screw in those tiny iPhone screws, child!”

https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/columnist/2025/05/06/trump-dolls-pencils-tariffs-kids/83460867007/

[underpants]

1. Easy there, Mr. President. I don't think we need to get too loosey-goosey with the rules 😆😆😆

Funniest thing I’ve read in a while.


On edit.

From AI.

Several pencil manufacturers are based in the United States, primarily in states like New Jersey, Tennessee, and Florida. Key companies include General Pencil Company in Jersey City, New Jersey, Musgrave Pencil Company in Shelbyville, Tennessee, and Dixon Ticonderoga Company with a main facility in Heathrow, Florida and a distribution center in Georgia.
Here's a more detailed look at the locations:
General Pencil Company:
Established in 1860, they have been manufacturing pencils in Jersey City, New Jersey, for over 140 years. They are known for their quality pencils and claim to make almost 9 million pencils annually.
Musgrave Pencil Company:
Founded in 1916, they are one of the few remaining American pencil manufacturers, located in Shelbyville, Tennessee, often referred to as "Pencil City".
Dixon Ticonderoga Company:
While they have a distribution center in Georgia and a facility in Heathrow, Florida, their manufacturing operations are primarily based in China, though they maintain a small presence in the US to claim domestic production status.

[Walleye]

2. At first, I thought he meant 30 different brands of dolls since he was limiting imports from China

And the kids would have less choice. But I think he really meant 30 dolls all at once. Tells you a lot about what Ivanka‘s Christmases must’ve been like.

[Midnight Writer]

3. Let's limit billionaires to three billion dollars apiece and skip all this austerity bullshit.

[Tanuki]

4. ....