Marco Rubio suffers humiliation by Trump - Another Day - Brian Tyler Cohen

[TexasTowelie]

BTC: Donald Trump forces his Cabinet to wear matching shoes. Still no word on if they need daddy to tie their laces for them. This is just another day.

Since the start of his second term, Donald Trump has been roundly criticized for his use of excessive policing. First, it was his takeover of the DC police. Then, it was his orders to infiltrate Minnesota with immigration police and now, we can add fashion police to that list. Because according to reports, Donald Trump makes all the guys in his Cabinet wear the same shoes.

Now, look, if I'm being honest, I'm a bit skeptical. I mean, if the men working under Donald Trump were really willing to debase themselves in such a pathetic fashion, I think some low-level White House staffer would have leaked it by now.

(cut to video)
JD Vance: I walk into the Oval Office and Marco and I are sitting there talking with the President about something. He says, "Stop." And he looks at our shoes and says, "You guys have terrible shoes." So, he goes and gets a shoe catalog. Now, remember this is the Christmas season, so the president's got some holiday cheer. He goes and gets a shoe catalog and gets his favorite shoes and orders like four pairs of shoes for me and four pairs of shoes for Marco because he's like, you know, we need our Vice President, our Secretary of State to look their very best. And, you know, then we went back to talking about whatever major, you know, international issue we were talking about.

(cut to studio)
BTC: Wow. And I thought being accused of fucking couches was embarrassing.

Yep. While many of us thought that it was merely a coincidence that the men in Trump's orbit had the same footwear preferences as every FBI agent from the 1950s, it turns out they're just following orders. Per the Wall Street Journal, the President has taken to guessing people's shoe sizes in front of them. He asks an aide to put in an order and a week later, a brown Florsheim box arrives at the White House. And what a generous way to waste time while not solving our nation's problems.

Unfortunately, there's another slight issue. Besides Donald Trump being a terrible president, he's also a terrible guesser. Because here's Marco Rubio recently photographed wearing the shoes daddy bought him, and it looks like he is literally wearing daddy's shoes. Maybe Trump just believed Stormy Daniels when she told him size doesn't matter. But seriously, look at that. I mean, I knew Marco was an exposed heel, but this is nuts.

Now, to be fair, there is a chance that this is merely an issue of perspective. It could turn out that Marco Rubio's shoes are normal-sized and that he is just a tiny person. But what undercuts that theory is that Sean Duffy, the Transportation Secretary, is wearing oversized shoes, too. Like, holy shit. These grown men need to do some actual soul searching.

What is so sad is that this twinning around the White House is not motivated by some sort of team building exercise, but rather by fear. According to that same report, all the boys have them, said a female White House official. She joked, "It's hysterical because everybody's afraid not to wear them." So, in case you're keeping score, Howard Lutnick is afraid to choose his own loafer, but when it comes to lying about his relationship with a pedophile…

(cut to video)
Howard Lutnick: My wife and I decided that I will never be in the room with that disgusting person ever again.

(cut to studio)
BTC: Fearless. Now, of all the Cabinet officials I feel for, Rubio tops the list because this is not even his first Shoegate.

(cut to video)
Reporter: This picture of presidential candidate Marco Rubio wearing a pair of trendy high heeled boots is getting a lot of attention.

(cut to video)
Inside Edition Reporter: The 5 foot 10 presidential hopeful is wearing boots with two inch heels. But the Rubio campaign says they're actually these fiscally responsible boots from Florsheim costing a mere $135. Rubio says all the attention on his boots is ridiculous.

Rubio: Our economy has flatlined. The stock market's falling apart. But boy are we getting a lot of coverage about a pair of boots.

(cut to studio)
BTC: That was way back in 2016. So, thank God Rubio finally fixed his shoe problems and all of our problems with the economy.

Now, it would be one thing to see these grown ass men degrade themselves for another adult just because they want to be on the good side of the captain of a winning team, but they might want to kick off those loose fitting shoes and check the scoreboard.

(cut to video)
Harry Enten: I took a look at all the polling, averaged it all together, and we have now reached the year mark. We have now reached the year mark in which he has a negative net approval rating. So we have been talking about this for a long period of time. According to my average of polls, what we've been looking at is every day since March 12th, 2025, President Trump has been underwater and we've been counting up the days. We've shown this slide a number of times and we have now reached the point in which Trump has been swimming with the fishes for a year.

(cut to studio)
BTC: If that's the case, Trump should buy his buddies some other footwear. The reality is Donald Trump has always put optics over competence. Because to him, success is about perception, not about actual results. His primary focus as commander-in-chief has not been about hiring the best people, but about hiring the best looking people.

(cut to video from Fox News)
Trump: Washington DC is a very safe city. We put our National Guard there. They're all central casting. You take a look at these guys. It's great.

(cut to another video from Fox News)
Trump: It's not just that we have the troops and they are central casting. I love I think to me it looks much more beautiful. You walk down the street, you have three guys that are 6'6” and angry looking people, but they actually are very nice.

(cut to video from RSBN)
Trump: They are serious guns. We got more guys and every one of them is like central casting, too. Holy shit, I'm looking. They look like Arnold Palmer. They look like Arnold. Can't look better than Arnold.

(cut to studio)
BTC: One has to assume Trump was talking about Arnold Palmer in his younger era and not the more recent Arnold Palmer who looks like he'd been soaking in an actual Arnold Palmer for the last 30 years. That's right. I said it. That young man foolishly had his looks ravaged by time, which will never happen to me.

None of what we're witnessing right now is an accident. It is the result of electing a man who has spent his entire life fixated on projecting a reality that does not exist. For years, he hung fake covers of Time magazines at his golf clubs. He claimed that the square footage of his penthouse was 20,000 feet more than it was. And the size of his penthouse wasn't even the only thing he felt the need to inflate.

(cut to video from 2016 GOP debate)
Trump: Look at those hands. Are they small hands? And he referred to my hands. If they're small, something else must be small. I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee it.

(cut to studio)
BTC: And to think all of us could have been spared from Donald Trump's disastrous masculinity affirming presidency if he'd simply been born with a regular sized penis.

But what's more startling than Donald Trump's need to project success is how willing his sycophants are to debase themselves to stay in his good favor, especially when they know exactly what's going on.

(cut to video from 2016 GOP campaign)
Rubio: I I will never stop until we keep a con man from taking over the party of Reagan and the and the conservative movement. He's a con man. He's a con man.

(cut to studio)
BTC: Then what does that make you? Because it looks like you're falling for the biggest con there is. Marco Rubio thinks that if he defends Trump at every turn, pedals Trump's lies on the Iran war, and wears the oversized shoes Trump bought for him, that it'll somehow be enough to stay in Trump's good graces. But it is all a con. Donald Trump doesn't care what you think. He cares how you look. That's how we wind up with people like Kristi Noem and Pete Hegseth. They look the part.

Pete Hegseth didn't get his job at top the Defense Department because of his stellar resume. He got it because Donald Trump was up late one night watching Josh Duhamel and Transformers went hunting for a lookalike. And it's pretty ironic that uh Trump thinks people should look a certain way considering Mr. Vagina Neck isn't exactly Harrison Ford.

All of these people in Trump's orbit could have some dignity, but are choosing not to. And at some point, you have to ask yourself, where do they draw the line? At what point do they decide that they've achieved enough wealth or enough power or high enough status that they don't need to run defense for pedophile protectors? That they no longer need to defend this administration's lies about the murder of innocent civilians. That they don't need to paint ripping kids away from their parents as protecting the homeland. That they don't need to pretend that kicking people off their healthcare is some noble effort. And that co-signing the Defense Department's white supremacist messaging is simply a bridge too far. There has not been a single action, policy, or piece of legislation from Donald Trump's administration that has made our country better. So, when the president says…

(cut to video)
JD Vance: "You guys have terrible shoes."

(cut to studio)
BTC: I just wish that was the least of our problems.