Is there a kitchen layout that doesn't involve

[Warpy]

3. Galley kitchen

which is an amazingly efficient layout. It doesn't satisfy the "cooking as theater" people or the ones who want to keep an eye on toddlers, but it works really well for people who cook. It also keeps the mess in the kitchen, out of sight from one's guests, and if the cook drops the roast, no one is going to be the wiser.

I find I can cope with most kitchens, even really bad ones, if there is a big enough landing area next to the stove for a cutting board and lazy Susan of condiments and utensils.