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seabeyond

(110,159 posts)
3. while i remember to say this, i will tell you something else. cuddling our babies.
Sat Dec 14, 2013, 02:15 PM
Dec 2013

i read a handful of years ago a study where it showed that a mother held her son less than her girls. not that anything was done purposely. it was our conditioned preconceived ideas about genders. i was literally appalled. having just naturally gone with parenting of seeing my babies as human, not gender, i held them lots. and lots and lots. i love holding them. so much my youngest REFUSED to get off my hip until 14 and half months, lol. (he is a different child in his own unique ways). my oldest i held to sleep. people telling me wrong. me telling them cant let him cry to sleep. my mom telling me wrong. at 4 mo i told her... then let him cry to sleep. you do it. cause i am not. 20 minutes later, baby in arms, she says... do it your way. lol.

i held, cuddled, loved on as a baby. not as a gender.

then i read the study. that is the difference. we do things that are pushing little boys away before their time. it is not wimping our little boys. they are, as girls, innately independent and given the security adn love and trust, they will let us know, each stage of the way, when they.... THEY are ready to step away to the next stage. we do not have to decide for them. given a secure and safe environment they do, and we follow along.

now... back to reading, lol

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